Miami 2008

Pop-pop kissing on Bex


peek-a-boo Pop-pop!


Us on Lisa's front porch (see Lisa's reflection in the window?)


Kristin & Dad in Lisa's backyard

Gerch's 98th Birthday

Cobb's Corner - post birthday feast! Velma, Lisa, Dad, Kristin, Mr. Cobb, & Gerch. It doesn't seem like that long ago, but it was 2001. So many people are gone...

today is Dad's 70th birthday...

and we should all be drinking bourbon and doing something Dad would be proud of! I have the first part down. The second part I'm struggling with (among other things).

Audrey Mitchell-Wineland

“Kristin – Your tape is broken!!” (circa ~ early 1980s)

I remember being SO excited to have been invited to travel with the Carstarphens to the beach for a whole week as Daughtry’s friend. I knew for sure I was going to be part of high-spirits, fun, and well, just plain “coolness.” And indeed I was. Right in middle of six, yes SIX, (barely) teenage girls. And Bill. (In hindsight, clearly this man had extraordinary capacity.) Despite being teased mercilessly for thinking Kristin’s Pink Floyd tape was broken (how could you not know it was just the sound effect?!); he seemed to have as much fun as anyone as master of ceremonies, card shark, beach comber, and chef. He radiated warmth, responsibility, a fun-loving nature and well, just plain “coolness.”

What else could explain convincing my parents to co-sponsor a surprise roller-rink party? Or to wiz around town in a caravan of convertible MGs and Fiats? And Lord only knows what else behind-the-scenes of the 1970s Unitarian Universalist Spartanburg, SC congregation. Surely then, this man was a Santa Claus for good times. And as testimonial to his steadfast good-cheer; as my mother was recently reminiscing about some of these past exuberances, Tim (Bill’s son-in-law) paused, furrowed his brow in bemusement and said “I love how you talk about it as if it was a phase.” Obviously for Bill it was not. And he was much loved and appreciated for it.

Love to his girls-
Audrey Mitchell-Wineland

South Africa - 2009

This is a great one! Dad drinking a beer in South Africa!

Arleen Clark Higgins

March 21, 2010

I will keep you all in my heart. Bill was so vibrant, a force of energy.

Arleen Clark Higgins
Robbinsville, NC

Yvonne McCracken

March 21, 2010

Truly a loss to his family, friends and Charlotte. Such a vibrant, caring person who will be missed greatly.

~

Yvonne McCracken,

Charlotte, North Carolina

Keith and Kim Pugh

March 21, 2010

Bill will be truly missed. He was a great leader and inspired those who served with him. You are in our thoughts and prayers.

~

Keith and Kim Pugh,

High Point, North Carolina

Henry and Mary Jo Underhill

March 21, 2010

Mary Jo and I will greatly miss you, dear friend.

Henry and Mary Jo Underhill
Seattle, WA

Leigh Warlick

Dear Lisa, Kristin, And Daughtry, I am so sorry about your loss. I know how hard it is to loose a parent. Please know that all of you are in my thoughts and prayers. He was a great and loving Father. I am sorry that I cannot be there on Monday. If you are in town this week let me know and I will come there. I love you all, Leigh

~

Leigh Warlick,

Asheville, North Carolina

Dana Taylor

Kristin,
I am so sorry to learn of your dad's passing. Please know I am thinking of you and the rest of the family. My heart just aches for you.
Sincerely,
Dana Taylor

~

Dana Taylor,

Spartanburg, South Carolina

Frankie & Chuck Johnson

Our prayers and thoughts and deepest grief are sent to you.
We love you and know all the wonderful memories of your life
with Bill and the good Lord will sustain you each day.
Frankie and Chuck

~

Frankie & Chuck Johnson,

Georgetown, Kentucky

Jennifer and Rusty Washburn

March 22, 2010

Lisa, Daughtry, and my dearest Kristin, You and your family are in our hearts and prayers.
We love you- Jennifer and Rusty Washburn

Jane Gray & Jerry Benson

March 22, 2010

Virginia, We are so sorry about Bill.Know our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Jane Gray & Jerry Benson

Murry Strawbridge

March 22, 2010

Thank-you Bill...for many things; mostly being my life long friend. You will always be missed; never forgotten...one dimming light on earth; another brightened in the night sky.
Murry Strawbridge

Paulette Purgason

March 22, 2010

Bill, you were important to so many throughout North and South Carolina. Your grace, your thoughtfulness, your smartness, and your playfulness rounded out your in-tune-ness with the communities you served with honor and commitment. I am honored to have been called Friend by you and that my family considered you Friend, as did I. More than forty years of friendship will be sorely missed.

~

Paulette Purgason,

Charlotte, North Carolina

Don and Kathy Riopel

March 22, 2010

Virginia
We are thinking of you today and are sorry we can't be with you. We will miss our dear friend and will enjoy fond memories of our times together.
Don and Kathy

~

Don and Kathy Riopel,

Charlotte, North Carolina

Patsy Lewis

March 22, 2010

Virginia Ware, I was so sorry to hear about Bill's untimely death. I only met him twice, but I was so impressed with his wonderful personality and love for you and life. Words cannot express my deepest sympathy for you and your family. My heart goes out to you. I will keep you in my prayers. If there is anything that I can do, please let me know.

Love, Patsy Lewis
Georgetown, Kentucky

Virginia Purnell Littleton

March 22, 2010

Virginia and family, you are all in my prayers. Bill was a great person and I know you will miss him. You two were a great couple. Thinking of you at the sad sad time.

Love Virginia Purnell Littleton
Elizabth City, North Carolina

Roy, Bea, and Hunter Smith

March 22, 2010

To all the Carstarphen family my deepest sympathies. Mr. Carstarphen was always a well respected person and a genuinely kind influence to us all. I'll be thinking about you all as I always have.

Roy, Bea, and Hunter Smith

Tommy Harrelson,

March 22, 2010

Bill Carstarphen was a highly respected public official, well known throughout the state. I admired him greatly and will miss knowing that I could call on him for advice and counsel.

~

Tommy Harrelson,

Southport, North Carolina

Harry D. and Linda Sue

March 22, 2010

Virginia Ware, Linda Sue and I were so shocked to learn of Bill's death. We knew Bill such a short time but knew from our first meeting him, that he was top notch. Our prayers are with you and the family. If there is anything we can do please let us know.

Harry D. and Linda Sue

David Taylor

March 22, 2010

I consider it a distinct privilege to have known and been a colleague of Bill's. He was well known in both North and South Carolina and a highly respected professional. He will be sorely missed.

~

David Taylor,

Greenville, South Carolina

Sue Walker

March 22, 2010

Dearest Lisa, Kristin and Daughtry, I was so saddened to read about your dad's death. How shocking. Please know that he was a wonderful father, husband, and businessman! and always a friend to me even though we did not stay in touch. My thoughts and prayers are with each of you and the entire extended family! May God bless each of you and hold you in the palm of his hand. ~Sue Almers Walker

~

Sue Walker,

Pawleys Island, South Carolina

Mandy Turner

Dear Lisa, Kristin, and Daughtry,

I remember going to school with all three of you in Spartanburg and meeting your father on a few occasions. He was always such a nice man to me and my parents. I was so sorry to read of his passing, and all three of you, along with the rest of the family, are in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time.

~

Mandy Turner,

Greenville, South Carolina

Richard Cates

March 23, 2010

There are rewards in heaven for the true and compassionate things he did here on earth for his love and true concern for people. For the strength and courage he had as city manager here in Greensboro, my son is alive. He gave me and my family encouragement the 157 days my 20 year old son went through for a bone morrow transplant in 1987. He has always been in our prayers and now the family who I do not know will be. Mr C was honest and fair. God bless all of the family.

~

Richard Cates,

Greensboro, North Carolina

Lee Galloway

March 23, 2010

I extend my deepest sympathy to Bill's family for this loss. I shall miss his visits to Town Hall in Waynesville when he was in town, and so looked forward to chatting with him and seeking his guidance and advice. He was generous with his time and was well respected in our profession. You are in my thoughts and prayers!

~

Lee Galloway,

Waynesville, North Carolina

Marilyn Coffman,

March 27, 2010

I was certainly appreciative of Bill's note on Jerry's Guest Book in June. I'm just so sorry that I have to write to you so soon. I know Jerry enjoyed working with Bill and we both enjoyed the many good times together. Bill will be greatly missed.

~

Marilyn Coffman,

Phoenix, Arizona

Sylvester Daughtry

March 30, 2010

We extend our condolences to the Carstarphen family. Bill was a great public servant with vision and boldness. He honored me by appointing me as Chief of Police for the City of Greensboro. Millicent and I will keep you in thoughts and prayers.

~

Sylvester Daughtry,

South Riding, Virginia

Mark & Melanie Hayes

April 03, 2010

Virginia & Family,

Melanie & I just heard about Bill's passing and are so sorry. Please know that our thoughts & prayers are with you & your family. We will always have fond memories of Bill, and were proud to have him as a cousin.
All our love.

Mark & Melanie Hayes

Asia - March 2010

This post is difficult for me - this was the last thing Dad did before he died. Not being there with him and understanding what he was experiencing has been helped a great deal by Jim Cochran, and his willingness to share his photographs from the group tour. They traveled in Cambodia, Bangkok, and many other places. I like to think that Dad had fun... I know he loved travel, always looked forward to meeting new people, and was surrounded by a great group of friends.

from Jim:

Daughtry,

Here some pictures I took of Virginia and Bill on our last two trips. We can never forget his infectious smiling face and twinkling eyes.

Bill was a joy to travel with around the southeast, our country and the world. He had an inquisitive mind and sought to understand different people’s culture, history and politics. In preparation for our South Africa trip, I’ll never forget how he and I both read and discussed the biography of Cecil Rhodes one of the founding fathers. We had many lively discussions over drinks and dinner about the various countries we visited and what we learned.

Always a positive person, Bill was up for anything. We had many great times together with Bill and Virginia bicycling in the southeast, visiting in the mountains, dancing and celebrating at Christmas, etc.

On our recent trip to Thailand, we learned that Buddha said “Happiness is right in front of you.” Bill was one of those people right in front of us that brought joy to our life. He is right there looking down. We loved him and miss him.

Dad & Virginia on the subway. This one I call "Hello tomorrow, hello yesterday..."



The group boat tour...



Robin Cochran, Virginia & Dad.


I love this one - Dad & Virginia look so happy on the Star Clipper!

Henry and Mary Jo Underhill - Seattle, WA

We are grateful for the opportunity to share and reflect upon our many warm memories of Bill Carstarphen. As I type this, I think how happy he would be about Duke's national basketball championship last night.

I first met Bill in 1965. I had just accepted an Assistant City Attorney position in the Charlotte City Attorney's office right out of UNC Law School, and Bill was an Assistant to City Manager Bill Veeder. Mary Jo and I quickly became friends with Bill and Stephanie, enjoyed backyard beer and cookouts together as well as the Charlotte Unitarian Church where we were befriended by Turley and Arlene Higgins. Because of our jobs, politics had to be definitely low key for Bill and I, but our spouses did not necessarily feel the same restrictions. In fact, the Democratic Party led all four of us to become close friends with Bill and Linda Ashendorf and Ralph and Susanne Ricketson. We socialized frequently and the Underhills, the Carstarphens and the Higgins also attended Duke- UNC football games together for several years.

When Bill became the City Manager of Greenville, NC, the Underhills and Higgins went down to Greenville for a weekend - a visit that was very much a weekend to remember. When Bill moved on to become City Manager in Spartanburg, SC the same foursome traveled from Charlotte for a similar weekend stay.

Once Bill was appointed Greensboro City Manager, our contacts were less frequent but Mary Jo and I would generally run into Bill and Agnes at the ACC Basketball Tournament in Greensboro. It was a tough time to be a Tar Heel during that period as Duke was dominant in basketball and Bill in his kind and not so subtle way made sure we were aware of that fact.

Because I was in the City Attorney's office for almost 30 years, Bill and I would frequently cross paths in NC municipal meetings and events around the state and an old friend of mine, the Greensboro City Attorney would also keep me posted on Bill's ups and downs as he dealt with the Greensboro City Council.

In 1995, I retired as City Attorney, and Mary Jo and I left Charlotte to move to Alexandria, VA when I started a second career as Executive Director of the International Municipal Lawyers Association (IMLA), headquartered in Washington, DC. I recall Bill visited with us once when he was in DC area on business and family matters.

I also fondly remember returning to Charlotte for either an ICMA or NLC Conference and having a delightful dinner with Bill and Virginia, a woman that he had begun dating. Bill was eager for me to meet Virginia and it was clear from the outset that the two of them were quite taken with one another.

At the end of 2006, I retired from my IMLA position, and after selling our house in Virginia, we moved to western NC for several months to be close to Mary Jo's mom before we left for our permanent destination in Seattle, WA. Once Bill and Virginia found out we were back in NC, they invited Mary Jo and I as well as Bill and Linda Ashendorf for an extraordinary weekend at their fantastic mountain home outside of Waynesville. We laughed a great deal, shared many stories about our children and grandchildren and mutual friends, ate delicious food and drank good wine, and relived over 40 years of friendship. For us, it was a weekend that we will forever remember.

Bill's sudden death affected us enormously. He was without question a wonderful, devoted and loving husband, father and grandfather. Moreover, Bill was the epitome of a person who was meant to be in public service. He clearly considered his profession as a noble calling and dedicated his life to it. He was properly viewed as an outstanding city manager in all of the communities he served and rightfully so.

But most of all Bill was a genuinely good and loving person that we are proud to remember as our dear friend.

Henry and Mary Jo Underhill
Seattle, WA

Paulette Purgason - Charlotte, NC

How lovely. I shall go through my photographs and try to find pictures and ask others that worked with us at City Hall in Charlotte to do likewise as well as to share remembrances of a "wild and funny guy."

We knew him before his girls, loved watching his growth as a Dad, and knew the joy he had when each daughter was born to him and your mother. He loved you so very much and was so very proud of his girls.

A beautifully designed blogspot. A great idea.

One of my personal favorites is the caricature I presented to him on behalf of his Charlotte City Hall family drawn by noted artist and WSOC-TV personality, Gene Payne. It would be nice to add that image to
your blog collection of Bill remembrances.

The best to your entire family, and especially to your mother, and to the love of his life beyond you-three and his grands, Virginia. Please give her my personal regards.

Sincerely, and with Joy at knowing the real "Bill."

Paulette W. Purgason

Michael & Renida Carter - Los Alamos, NM

My memory of Mr. Carstarphen began in my grade school days in Spartanburg, SC. He was the father of three daughters about my age who I don't really recall my first introduction to - but in time they would become sisters to me while we were all growing up on Henson Street. The Carstarphen's house was Grand Central Station for the neighborhood - from kick the can to front-yard camp outs, it was the place to hang out.

At this time, Mr. Carstarphen was City Manager of Spartanburg, SC - as a youngster this was nothing more than a title to me. He wore a suit and tie to work just like my Dad the banker. But Mr. Carstarphen had that red MGB sporting an electric overdrive which was much more alluring to a boy than our family's Dodge Dart. Of course the refrigerator full of Pearl beer didn't help that hip image, but the '80s were a hard time to be a beer connoisseur.

Elementary School came and went, then Junior High, and into High School. Somewhere along the line, I acquired the nickname of 'George' from his girls which Mr. Carstarphen immediately picked up and I would have to leave town to shake that name! Adolescence would of course bring a steady stream of suitors to the Carstarphen house and I recall with some amusement that there were times when Mr. Carstarphen would inform various gentlemen that visiting hours were over but I would somehow slip under the radar and remain on the couch watching TV... Was it just that I had become such a fixture in their living room that he no longer noticed or was it that he had a soft spot for the kid from down the street. Regrettably, I'll never know the answer to that question, but I'll always cherish those memories.

Our thoughts are with Lisa, Kristin, and Daughtry as they struggle to let the light of their fond memories for their father shine through the darkness of this sudden loss.

With our deepest regrets and all our love,
Michael "George" & Renida Carter
Los Alamos, NM

Kristin's Memorial Speech

March 22, 2010 - Kristin's Memorial Speech:

My Dad was the greatest guy ever. He was born in a very small town in eastern North Carolina to two fairly influential parents so was subsequently adored and spoiled rotten. So much so that his Uncle Bryant continually referred to him as "Little Lord Jesus." At 18 he went off to Duke University where his father and his father and his father had attended. He became a die-hard Blue Devil fan, which my 2 UNC graduate sisters paid dearly for. He went on to complete 30 years of service in city management and along the way became the father of three little daughters. During this experience of fatherhood he spent 3 long years as a single parent to these daughters during their teenage years. Because his first daughter Lisa was so well-behaved, I think he felt that raising teenage girls wouldn't be that difficult. However, Daughtry & I soon shook him out of that notion and gave him his first grey hairs. He sent us all to college - not batting an eye when I ended up on the five year - and then on to graduate school. When we left home for our college days, he began the tradition of the "Saturday morning phone call." He would call each of us every Saturday morning to check on us and to see how our weeks had been. This Saturday morning tradition continued until present day.


My Dad's feathers were hard to ruffle. Throughout our years of youthful digressions, some of our acquaintances (mainly mine) could have easily been considered persons of questionable standards, or less than stellar human beings. But he accepted them all with open arms and was able to see the good in each. 

Many times during my 42 years I found it difficult to understand and accept life's intricacies, and came to him for guidance. He always took my hand and had a calming explanation of how the world works and what could and could not be done about it. He was a lover of life. He embraced every opportunity to experience it and participate. So much so that it exhausted me to try and up with his and Virginia's schedule. 

He loved his work. After retiring from city government, he spend a short period of time working in the private sector. he soon realized that to be his true self, he needed to work for the betterment of society. His unending desire to improve this world led him back to public service and he found a place for that in CATS. He had an uncanny ability to convince people that he knew everything. This undoubtedly helped him in his quest to squeeze money out of the NC legislature for CATS.


He loved his friends - old ones and new ones. He never met a person he could not find something positive about. But most of all he loved his family - Franki and Fagie, Jane Grey, Strawbridge, Carlisle Brown & Gene Kendall.  He loved his sweet little grandsons who would wake him up at down to go down to the basement and run the electric train set. And he loved us.


As I stand before you today, I must admit that I have had a very difficult time realizing he is gone. I cry because my heart is broken. I cry because I am angry that such a good man was taken from us before his time. i cry because he will never see what fine young men his grandsons will grow up to be. But most of all I cry because I am thankful. Because you see, of all the Dads in the world, he was given to me. And for that gift I thank every star in the heavens. Thank you all for coming, and for being such a big part of Dad's life.

Bill Guerrant - Charlotte, NC

Dear Carstarphens All:

My name is Bill Guerrant and I retired as City of Charlotte public service and information director in 1997. I worked with Bill here in Charlotte and once as a consultant when he was city manager of Greensboro. The last time I saw Bill was at a breakfast gathering of retired city employees; Bill joined us when he could and at this session was sporting a leg cast and of course a lengthy story about his Mt. LeConte adventure. Unfortunately I was not able to attend Bill's service and meet all of you. The wonderful pictures on the blog show Bill as he was: happy, vibrant, full of life, laughing, loving, inquisitive and caring. He was a very special husband, Dad, Pop Pop, public servant, friend and role model. I will truly miss his smile, the twinkle in his eyes, his stories and his great love of life.

I have attached a picture taken in October, 2008 when a group of retired city employees went on a day trip to visit former Charlotte City Manager Wendell White and his wife Ruth at their mountain home near Sparta, NC. Before lunch we gathered in the cool mountain air for this group shot. Pictured from left are: Tom Campbell, Gus Psomadakis, Clark Readling, Ann Marsh, Wendell White, Bill Carstarphen, Ed Sizer and Bill Guerrant. It was a wonderful day full of stories, jokes, and of course Bill's great laugh.

My sincere condolences to you all,

Bill Guerrant
guerrantcom@sprintmail.com

Pop-pop & Keel at the mountain house

June 2009 - Waynesville, NC

Will & Jane's Wedding

Will, Dad & Jonathan before Will & Jane's wedding. Dad always did look good in a tux.

Dad & Jane dancing. Look at the expression on Dad's face!

Me, Kristin, Dad & Lisa at the reception.